Sunday, March 22, 2009

My Two Pieces from Friday--Argh!!!

I am in a moderate-level funk at the moment. Friday, my painting group (SOCALPAPA) painted at Alta Laguna with views of Catalina on one side and the Saddleback Valley on the other. High fog socked in over the ocean, so all painted the hill and valley side. I am right at the point where as a piece starts developing I get really, really excited because it seems to be coming together, me being just very loose, going for it and doing the wild woman thing, unlike the careful, careful ladies. I think that I am just on the edge of making a significant breakthrough, but at some point that I can't quite pinpoint it all starts to fall apart, maybe quite badly. I continue beating the dead horse since being cautious isn't going to save it. It is either the catbox for it or being even bolder. Hm-m-m, guess which. Not terribly daunted, I start another one, doing better at the outset, but the light is changing over the valley as I knew it would and the inland fog is burning off. I can see the series of arcs of subdivision rooftops with dark areas in between; streets and grass. I am having trouble with separation now between the hill I am looking over the top of and is the darkest value. The valley is bathed in light and merges into the pale grey of the sky--light, light, light. I wipe off that portion and make it lighter still, blend for soft edges, but it isn't working. I wipe off my brushes and run them through the cleaner, every one that I own is dirty, and I stash my messes in the wet panel carrier and schlep all back to the car. I don't look at them until this afternoon. This is normal as I can never look at what I have done for a day or two. The one is as bad as I thought, maybe more. Greens, god I have trouble with greens, and the hills are very much so right at this moment. The other, I hope that I can still scrape the valley portion off (the paint is thick) and tackle that portion again tomorrow.

Friday night, trying to figure out the wrong fork in the road I don't have a clue. Part of me would like to ask for help but the other part realizes that since it is procedural learning I'll just have to flail my way through until I can make things work on some kind of consistent basis. I still don't have a clue, so spend the rest of the evening watching TV to get my mind off of it. Saturday morning I wake up and the first thing that comes to my conscious mind is that one of the problems likely is that at some point, such as when I start having trouble mixing a color, I start looking more at my palette and the painting than at what I am painting. How can it come off of the paintbrush correctly if I am not looking anymore? I know that this isn't all of it, but it is something. I wish I had more confidence heading into the second round. Maybe a picture tomorrow if it isn't too lunch upchucking....

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